Joy … embrace it.
Summary
Life is full of choices. It may be full of hardships too, but we have choices when those hardships come. As we hear in Langston Hughes’ poem:
Well, son, I’ll tell you:
Life for me ain’t been no crystal stair.
It’s had tacks in it,
And splinters,
And boards torn up,
And places with no carpet on the floor-
Bare;
But all the time
I’se been a’climbin’ on,
And reachin’ landin’s,
And turnin’ corners
But even then, when I let go of focusing on restrictions, what not to do, but rather what to do … particularly when I choose to do good rather than harm me or others, that’s when I fully embraced joy and that’s when I embraced a universal presence that encompasses God and all beings. Don’t let anyone steal your joy. If you’re going to allow someone else to control your emotions, you’ve already lost. So, the thing about joy is to truly be in control of yourself. You must know who you are and get comfortable with yourself to really embrace joy.
This edition of my podcast focuses on some simple strategies to embrace joy. Joy isn’t complicated. The presence of joy comes from simple approaches to how we see ourselves, how we see and treat others, how we own our emotions, how we give our energy to what we do, the gratitude we have. With tacks and splinters, still climbin & reachin even when there ain’t been no crystal stair … turn the corner and embrace joy. Always own your own power and you will win in all ways. — Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/ownyourownpower/message
Transcription
So, the theme I’m focusing on for this year is Embrace. This edition of my podcast is about Embracing Joy and stepping forward in joy when things are good & even when not so great.
Have you ever heard the phrase, “life for me ain’t been no crystal stair?” That phrase comes from a poem by Langston Hughes. Here’s the full poem:
Well, son, I’ll tell you:
Life for me ain’t been no crystal stair.
It’s had tacks in it,
And splinters,
And boards torn up,
And places with no carpet on the floor —
Bare;
But all the time
I’se been a’climbin’ on,
And reachin’ landin’s,
And turnin’ corners,
And sometimes goin’ in the dark,
Where there ain’t been no light.
So boy, don’t you turn back;
Don’t you sit down on the steps,
’Cause you finds it’s kinder hard;
Don’t you fall now —
For I’se still goin’, honey,
I’se still climbin’,
And life for me ain’t been no crystal stair.
As I think about the challenge of embracing joy, I think about the choice of parents, of a mother of a son who gets up every morning to get her children to school and then goes to work two jobs, then comes home to check their homework and cook meals for them. I think of a father who goes to work and is mistreated, called a nigger more times than he can count, is underemployed and while holding a college degree, still has to work at a job where his boss is less qualified than he is. And yet, these parents choose to raise their children to be respectful of their teachers, of their pastor, of the store clerk and to be joyful for what they do have.
They are doing what Langston Hughes’ poem says: “climbin on, reachin, turnin corners, sometimes goin in the dark where there ain’t been no light” … sometimes the path each of us is on has tacks in it and splinters and boards torn up and places with no carpet on the floor. And even in 2023, young Black men aren’t getting the chance to grow up to be old because of the systemic lack of accountability in policing, because of the racism that is still imposed by a privilege that refuses to acknowledge that its days are fading.
With all of this, I want to embrace joy. That may sound a bit bizarre after facing almost dystopian odds. But yes, I want to embrace joy because we must. We must or we give in to those who would wish us to fail. As Langston’s poem says, “don’t you fall now, don’t you sit down on the steps ’cause you finds it kinder hard.”
As I have often said, life is full of choices. It may be full of hardships too, but we have choices when those hardships come.
Is the glass half full or is the glass half empty? So much of how we respond to what happens to us is how we see that glass. I have family members and friends who look at me and say I’m optimistic, maybe too much so or to a fault. That is my nature, my natural way of being. My mother was that way as well, always very optimistic, focused on positive outlooks, expecting things to work out no matter how bleak they might initially appear.
As long as I can remember in most every situation, that is how I approach things in life and how I advise my daughters and son to do as well. I do so because having that as a mode of operating, gets you in a state of mind that things are possible and you can do whatever you are setting out to do but also because whatever situation you are in, some good can come from it. And that I truly believe.
When I was very young, I wondered about whether a person’s life was predetermined when they were born. Did each of us already have a set date for our death. That was a question that I thought about for a long time. But just posing that question wasn’t optimistic to me so I stopped giving it weight, stop letting it guide me, stop letting it decide what I did or didn’t do. I chose to live life joyfully without needing to be held back from whether or not there was a date already written in the universe or God’s giant book for my death.
Raised as a Catholic, there were so many doctrines and teachings that the nuns and priests put in our minds during my twelve years of Catholic school from first grade through twelfth grade. A solid academic foundation in many respects that set me up for success in college. Yet in other ways, I was downloaded with views about religion and God that weighed me down, rules about condemnation if I didn’t do certain things, what I should or shouldn’t do and what restrictions there were for me to live, sometimes frankly that could prevent joy if the rules weren’t followed to absolute degree. Religion can sometimes do that, though I’m not speaking of it here to dissuade you from practicing what works for you and your relationship with God. I’m simply stating that what I learned along the way as I grew up as an adult, as I raised my own children and did my own readings of teachings is that for me God in its purest form is love and joy. That’s what God shows us, teaches us, and wants us to know.
God is joy. God is love. And knowing this God is how I embrace joy. I found that embracing joy and love is what brought me the closest to the spiritual presence of God.
When I let go of focusing on restrictions, what not to do, but rather what to do … particularly when I choose to do good rather than harm me or others, that’s when I fully embraced joy and that’s when I embraced a universal presence that encompasses God and all beings. I found purpose and didn’t worry any more about a date certain for anything, and certainly not worrying about my death.
Let me give a caution on joy. Don’t let anyone steal your joy. If you’re going to allow someone else to control your emotions, you’ve already lost. So, the thing about joy is to truly be in control of yourself. You must know who you are and get comfortable with yourself to really embrace joy. Yeah. Did you realize that would be a part of embracing joy. It’s not a constraining factor though, it’s a retaining factor. To have the maximum retention of your joy, own your own power. Indeed, this is what my overall podcast is always about. When we own our own power, we win. That is joy.
Spending time with you to be you, to feel satisfied with who you are is important to being joyful. And so, the opposite is true. When we aren’t joyful, the reason could be related to not being comfortable with ourselves. That may be where we have some work to do. This is an internal component to joy. What you seek, you must have. And if you feel you don’t have it, give it and you will receive it.
One of the quickest ways to receive something is to give it. That’s an interesting concept, right? In the year 2000, when I really began to delve more into meditation and grow my religion with deeper connections of spirituality, I came across the concept that what we seek is within because God has provided it to us all, yet it comes through most clearly when we give it to others. Mother Teresa used to talk about this concept. For example, when you want to feel loved, give love. When you want to feel joy, give joy. The experiential nature of life. That is God being God through us. Okay, I may be getting too wonky but it’s just that in giving we receive. That’s it. Just that simple. Embrace joy by giving joy, by being joy.
Last thought on what I believe is critical for embracing joy is gratitude. As I write this podcast, it’s the heart month and I have such gratitude for my heart and all that it allows me to do. A relative recently had a health concern regarding her heart and cardiovascular functions. She had to re-assess her daily routines. She has since been given the all-clear sign from her doctors and that made her grateful and joyful. Many women and philosophers in general talk of the power of gratitude. Gratitude is powerful, power filled. Be grateful even when you think what you want hasn’t yet happened. It is the action of gratitude that sets the stage for what will come. Expectation isn’t what does it. Gratitude is a message to the universe of acceptance for what you believe already to be. Gratitude is joy personified for what your heart knows.
As I close, let me share some very simple advice that I recently heard. I think it is applicable to embracing joy and living a joyful life: Be polite, be on time and be nice to people. When we do those three simple things, we are set up for joy. Joy comes. Because joy isn’t complicated. The presence of joy comes from simple approaches to how we see ourselves, how we see and treat others, how we own our emotions, how we give our energy to what we do, the gratitude we have. With tacks and splinters, still climbin & reachin even when there ain’t been no crystal stair … turn the corner and embrace joy.
Thank you for listening. Always own your own power and you will win in all ways.
Originally published at http://ownyourownpower472698701.wordpress.com on February 12, 2023.
